Sunday, January 22, 2012

Overly Responsible Journalism

This was an email I typed up a couple months ago but never sent - I had originally intended on throwing this to the Colbert Report, but never got around to it. It's a bit of lighter humor on the subject of journalism.
I was shocked this morning by a headline I read in the news:
“Dead Body Found in Texas ‘Occupy’ Camp – Police arrest Portland Protesters”
I was shocked by the sheer hypocrisy – obviously, many of these “OWS’ers” are in the 1%!
How do you explain them murdering a man in Denton, Texas, and being arrested for it later that morning in Oregon? They clearly were using a private Concord jet!
Intrigued, I click on the story to read the link, but was disappointed to find that the two halves of the headline were unrelated: A homeless man who was an active participant of the “Occupy Denton” movement was found by members of the group, who then alerted the police and disbanded the encampment. The story in Portland was entirely unconnected.
This seems like a rather encouraging trend in “overly”-responsible journalism. Why not combine more headlines?
How about: “Dead Body Found in Texas ‘Occupy’ Camp – Amnesty International Calls for Bush’s Arrest?”
Or: “Woman Pinned by Floridian Eagle – Obama fined for $700k”
Or even better:
“Osama bin Laden is Dead – Finally, a Win for Tiger Woods”
I sure hope our Golfer-in-chief thanked Seal Team Six for that “hole-in-one.”

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